The Expat Life

Reason #3242874329743 of why I hate this country

So yesterday we got a very suspicious letter in the mail.. Actually, they don’t have an adequate mail system here, they just throw letters over your gate every now and then. Basically, somebody had thrown a letter in a golden envelope and my mother received it.

I asked her what it was, but she seemed to be nervous and defensive, for some reason. I noticed that she was clutching the letter tightly in her hands. When I asked her what it was about, she denied that it was of any importance.

Later on when my uncle dropped by, I coerced him into reading it to me. When he read it out, I was pretty shocked, which surprised him. It turns out, this is actually a pretty normal occurrence. 

The letter was a three page, typed letter with many different accounts. The first account? Osama Bin Laden. Apparently, he said he needs more combatants for the “War Against Terror” which is ironic because that is exactly what the United States seems to be fighting right now. Sheikh Bin Laden also stated that the Shariat should prevail in all the lands, and that God would make sure of this.

Then there was an account from a man named “Mullah Umar” who is supposed to be his general, I believe. He basically stated the same thing, except in a more poetic format. My uncle did not bother to read the rest of the letter.

Now, let’s not forget that my house was not the only one on the receiving end of this letter. The funny thing, however, is that I didn’t see them littering the streets or being burned or even being thrown out into the garbage the next day. There was no outcry, no police, no investigation, nothing. 

I dislike the United States more and more everyday. I can’t really be proud to belong to a nation which indirectly endorsed the genocide, gendericide, and mass rape in Bangladesh, among other things. This is why I plan to move to another country when I get back.

I have a personal problem with the United States, too. I contacted them months ago, hoping that they would in a sense, rescue me from my present situation. Better in a foster home than here, I thought (and still do think). However, they didn’t give a flying fuck while I was talking to them, but when my mother calls them, they end up showing at our door to ask if everything is fine.

I was told that even if everything is not fine, I would have to stay here until the consulate got clearance from Washington to bring me back home. Even then, I was supposed to have a place to stay (which I obviously don’t). So when they asked me if I was fine, I lied. I told them everything was just fine. I told them everything was fucking dandy, but it wasn’t. Those bastards left and I sank under deep shit.

In other news:
Fuck you, Washington. Fuck you.

The Various Shortcomings of the Country of Pakistan

Oh people of Pakistan, please get this through your mind:

-You are NOT a Muslim country. Just cause your name contains the prefix “Pak”, doesn’t make you a Muslim country, I’m sorry. In fact, you are anything BUT a Muslim country. It is the law system of the British, you have implemented into your own constitution, not Shariah Law. I admit, bits and pieces of Shariah Law are mixed into the compilation of laws, but Islam also states that you must follow the religion as a whole to be considered a Muslim, not pick out the pieces which you favor.

-There is NOTHING special located within the vicinity of your country’s borders that is even of minuscule interest to super powers and other third world countries. Nobody likes you for your natural gas deposits. Nobody likes you for your textile industry, because it is something that other countries now have, except cheaper and with better quality. Nobody is after your government, because it has nothing of interest in it. Nobody is after your economy, because it is still in it’s premature stages, and would benefit no one. Get this through your heads please.

-The bombings and killings are NOT a result of foreign covert operations, because operatives don’t blow themselves up to kill others. Why would foreign covert operatives even want to set foot in Pakistan? What would they even be after? If you still dream that there is something oh-so-valuable inside of Pakistan that people would be after, please refer to my previous point.

-Most people say that they are not terrorists, but that simply is NOT true because the ideology they possess in their minds is exactly the same or somewhat similar to the ideologies of terrorist groups and leaders. Notice that I say most people, not everybody. So don’t piss me off by telling me that I’m incorrect because you aren’t a terrorist. Whatever. Get over it.

-If you think you are perfect Muslims, well guess what. YOU AREN’T. I’ve had many a people tell me that I need to be a good Muslim and whatnot, but there’s something very hypocritical about that. Islam doesn’t permit men to even keep a mustache, and yet the mustached man is telling me to be a better Muslim. Also, your average cultural marriage includes a LOT of things that a true Muslim would witness and be horrified. The dancing, the clothes, the signs of status, the music, etc. If I remember correctly, these are all looked down upon in Islam. Now you tell me, is this not the definition of hypocritical? Oh yeah, and by the way: Allah, the Quran, and Islam all hate hypocrites. And since you are a hypocrite, A=B, B=C, therefore A=C. 

-The world does NOT only include Pakistan and its customs and traditions. I find it funny how when most Pakistanis watch Hollywood movies, the only thing they are able to note about foreign countries are the women, the strip clubs, and the alcohol. I’ve been living in Pakistan for about a bit over a year, and I’ve had countless people ask me about these things. IS THAT ALL YOU CAN THINK ABOUT?! The funniest part about all this is that they actually condemn this stuff in public, in front of other Muslims. Again, hypocritical much?

-The Pakistani Army is NOT the best in the world. In fact, this is common knowledge that the United States is one of the many suppliers of weapons and arms to Pakistan. The military is still using outdated technology and weaponry, such as the already replaced G3, and several guns of the Kalashnikov series. The Air Force still uses old fighters and bombers which are usually supplied by (surprise, surprise) the United States of America and on occasion, China. Now, don’t get started with the whole “nuclear power” argument. So what if Pakistan has nuclear power? Only approximately 2.4% of the nation’s electricity comes from nuclear power plants. So why are you so proud of being a nuclear power? Besides, it isn’t like you discovered nuclear power by yourself. The Pakistani government bought the secrets from a US/Turkish ambassador. Not bad for a nation’s government which is trying to eliminate corruption, eh? 

Refer to this link for more information: http://www.globalfirepower.com/

-The much-respected concept of “warm” and “cool” foods in Pakistani culture and tradition is NOT reality. “Lassi”, is not “cool”. If you have a heterogeneous mixture of milk and water, it does not change the chemical properties of the liquid mixture. The drink remains a mixture of water and milk. So please explain to the world then, how lassi is a cool drink? While you’re at it, if you find even one actual scientific study from a credible source agreeing with this belief, please tell me so that I could actually start to care about what Pakistani tradition and customs dictate.

-India is NOT after you, Pakistan. Neither are you behind India. This is all a bunch of hype. In fact, you’ll notice that even if there were a war between India and Pakistan, India has won much of the propaganda war already due to it’s huge earnings in the Bollywood movies sector, and because of other sources of entertainment such as Indian music, and Indian entertainment such as Star Plus. Everytime somebody watches a Bollywood movie in theaters, a fraction of that money exits the Pakistani economy and enters the Indian economy. Then you get scared that India is going to bomb you with fighters. Well, I have news for you: Usually if you dislike something you boycott it, not support it. 

Feedback, questions, comments?